Beast Putty + Kansas City: A Match Made in Weird

The Arabia Steamboat sank into the Missouri River in the 1800s, then the river shifted and buried it under a cornfield until 1980s treasure hunters excavated perfectly preserved artifacts worth millions.

Unearth your buried feelings with our putty.

The Glore Psychiatric Museum housed sadistic torture devices like the "Tranquilizer Chair," "Bath of Surprise" (ice water submersion), and the "Lunatic Box" (upright coffin for induced calm).

We therapy without the trauma.

During Prohibition, Kansas City completely ignored federal law, running wide-open speakeasies, brothels, and all-night jazz clubs under political boss Tom Pendergast.

Break the rules responsibly—squeeze our putty.

Fat Matt's Vortex dive bar is built inside an old funeral home with the crematorium still in the basement, allegedly haunted.

We cremate stress, not bodies.

Kansas City holds the Guinness Record for the largest Tuba Ensemble (achieved 2018), featuring hundreds of tubas playing simultaneously.

We provide bass-level stress relief.

Possible early names for Kansas City were "Rabbitville" and "Possum Trot" before settling on Kansas City.

Be glad they didn't name it after rodents—that's weird even for us.