Beast Putty + Miami: A Match Made in Weird

It snowed in Miami exactly once—January 19, 1977—when a cold front merged with an arctic high, creating a freak weather anomaly that never happened again.

That's how rare our putty quality is.

Miami Beach is almost entirely manmade—the white sand beaches don't exist naturally and were imported from the Bahamas and Caribbean islands.

Build your own stress-free paradise with our putty.

Perky's Bat Tower (1929) was built to control mosquito populations using live bats—all the bats immediately flew away and never came back.

Even bats escape stress. We help you stay.

Miami is built on swamps and sandy ground too unstable for basements or subways—there's literally an abandoned underground train station from the 1970s beneath the airport.

Solid ground or not, we'll squeeze your stress.

During Prohibition, Miami was a major rum-running hub where smugglers used waterways to smuggle millions of dollars in illegal alcohol.

We traffic in stress relief—totally legal.

It's illegal to sell oranges on a Miami sidewalk—violators face up to 30 days in jail for fruit sales.

Keep your hands on putty, not produce.